Every Sunday I like to read the paper. And every Sunday when I get to the magazine, I get the same old shit.
Today’s Sunday Life in the Sun Herald, article by Helena de Bertodano on January Jones, first sentence:
I am sitting in the bar of the Loews Hotel in New Orleans waiting for January Jones, the actress who plays the immaculate Betty Draper in the hit television series Mad Men, set in the early 1960s.
Have you ever read such an uninspired first sentence in all your life? Each week the celebrity story begins the same way: I am sitting somewhere posh waiting for someone famous. Well guess what? If you’ve interviewed the celebrity, then I can work out that you either met them in person or spoke to them on the phone. I’m clever like that.
The Sydney Morning Herald‘s Good Weekend is not immune either. Poor Man Friend is often startled when I hurl the damn thing to the floor in disgust.
Not only is “I’m sitting in the place waiting for the person” the most boring way to start a feature, it’s arrogant. There is a place for using “I” in a feature, but I haven’t seen it done well in a long, long time. And that’s a shame.