Let’s just call it a vagina

The SMH is running another article on designer vaginas. I’m sure they ran one in June or July, but you can never have too many stories about female body parts on a news site.

This time it’s an opinion piece by Suzy Freeman-Greene, but the odd thing is that it’s out of context. The was a story on designer vaginas on the ABC website on the 12th, but c’mon, it’s now the 20th:

Aren’t women insecure enough without fretting over their genitalia?

Funny, I didn’t think I was insecure. Am I supposed to fret over my vagina? Fretting over my vagina sounds like a sex move. Is there something wrong with my vagina? Does it not work? How many times do you think I can write vagina in this post?

An ability to dance like a stripper seems depressingly necessary for many of today’s female pop stars, with videos virtually shot from the floor up. This new focus on women’s genitalia is mirrored elsewhere in pop culture, with suburban pole dancing classes and Brazilian waxes that impose a pre-pubescent beauty ideal on adult parts.

Didn’t we have this conversation a few years ago?

Dr Ted Weaver, president of the Royal Australian and NZ College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists, told Freeman-Greene: “She doesn’t have to conform to a picture that she might have noticed in a girlie magazine”.

Because women never look at porn unless it’s accidental.

Raunch culture has a lot to answer for here. And as the shape of the vagina becomes a crazy new source of angst, we still don’t even have an affectionate word to describe it. Where is the cosy, non-threatening equivalent to ”willy”?

I dunno, why not just call it a vagina? Or vulva, if that’s what you’re referring to.

Update: Freeman-Greene blames Britney’s 3 video clip for making women insecure about their vaginas. The way she described it, I was expecting clit cam and a few damp patches. So I watched it. And I disagree. You’d have to be trying really hard to see the detail Freeman-Greene writes about. The only interesting thing about the clip was that the men were fawning over Britney, rather than the other way ’round. And that’s nice to see.

8 responses to “Let’s just call it a vagina

  1. non threatening!!!- I didn’t realise my vagina was a WMD?

  2. although I’m tempted to start with the whole designer vagina naming options (armani punani) but we’ve been there before 🙂

    • Armani punani is very very good. Will see if I can use it in conversation at work. Have managed to use For China a few times without people noticing. And, Alan Kohler said For China in his finance report on the ABC news last week.

  3. I agree with Suzy Freeman-Greene on this: ie – “An ability to dance like a stripper seems depressingly necessary for many of today’s female pop stars”.

    Exactly. And I’m sick of it so never watch TV videos.

    Don’t understand your glib/mocking attitude. No reply necessary unless it’s constructive.

    • You want the right to leave a comment on my blog, but I’m only allowed to reply if it’s “constructive”. Wow, that’s some arrogance you’ve got there.

      But yes, I was mocking Suzy Freeman-Greene’s opinion piece. I have no problem calling my vagina a vagina. Or referring to my vulva. Those are the proper names. Would you prefer if I called it my twinkle-woo-hoo? What, are you three years old?

      And you’ll notice that nowhere in my post have I said female pop stars dancing like strippers is ok. My criticism was twofold: that her piece is several years too late, and that it’s completely ridiculous to be whining about not having a “pretty” name for women’s genitals.

  4. All replies should be constructive, but not all are.

    As I thought, your reply is abusive. “Wow, that’s some arrogance you’ve got there.” What are you talking about. I am not arrogant. It’s you who are arrogant.

    And then you say “Would you prefer if I called it my twinkle-woo-hoo? What, are you three years old?” . . . . Who’s the 3 year old here? What an idiot. I don’t care WHAT you call it.

    I didn’t say anything in my post about naming body parts, if you read it properly. Who cares what it’s called. My point was about the sleazy dancing in videos today.

    What an arsehole. Am unsubscribing from this unconstructive drivel. Put your dummy back in.

    • Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. I suggest you consider the implication of going to someone’s place and telling them you disagree with their point and then telling them they shouldn’t bother replying unless you personally judge their comment to be “constructive”. That, AP, is arrogance. And if you left a comment expecting me to be “abusive”, then I can only assume that you were deliberately provoking an argument. If you really thought this blog was drivel, then why did you subscribe in the first place?

      You are not welcome here.

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