Quick, look at my dick!

I think I’m onto something with Tony Abbott and his dickstickers. Every time he pisses women off, he poses in what is essentially his undies. Like he thinks that will distract us, because our little brains can’t focus on criticising him when faced with His Hotness. Clearly he fancies himself as the Throbbing Member of Parliament.

Yesterday he insulted us with the ironing. Today he’s pulled out the lycra (well, it has been a little chilly lately):

Now, I’m sure there was something I had to be mad at him about, but I’ve come over all unnecessary*.

* This is complete and utter bullshit because he makes my skin crawl.

9 responses to “Quick, look at my dick!

  1. Why doesn’t he just get himself a codpiece and be done with it?

    • I am totally for this idea. Even though he’d be standing with his hands on his hips, pelvis thrust forward, there’d be considerably more clothing between me and his unmentionables than there is when he wears lycra.

  2. That picture has totally killed my sex drive… I don’t know that looking at men on bikes is ever going to be the same for me again… and Le Tour is porn to me! Damn you Tony Abbott!

    • Maybe killing your sex drive is the point, what with you being one of those young, professional, educated women who likes to have sex and pulls him up on the shit that comes out of his mouth. The funny thing is, my brother had a pair of those pants when he was a triathlete in training, and the crotch is padded so they sit upright by themselves. It looks like a mega pad for the heaviest day ever has been sewn into them.

      • So Tony’s just being a good catholic then… making sure that the women of Australia won’t be tempted to disobey ‘the rules’ and encouraging celibacy by creating an association between his dick and sex?

        The guy I just broke up with is a cyclist… the crotch on those pants does look like some kind of sanitary underwear from the 50’s on steroids… but the view from behind is so pretty… please nobody takes pictures of Abbott’s bum!

  3. Ok so I think I, and possibly you NWN, have developed a bit of an obsession with ‘he who must not be named’ (I am taking a Hogwarts approach to him in an attempt to reduce his airtime). This obsession is not borne out of lust (collective shudder) but a car crash fascination with the bizarreness of his opinions and behaviour. Then I realised, all these ‘gaffs’ are not gaffs at all. I think he knows full well he will piss lots of people off but he keeps doing and saying them and flaunting his body (lets have another collective shudder at the mention of it) with all these undies stunts to keep himself in the spotlight – ‘junkyard dog-style’. The more people talk about him and his views, the more his ridiculous opinions seep into the collective consciousness and become part of mainstream debate.

    Having said that, there is a good essay in this months “The Monthly” about ‘youknowwho’. It is quite balanced with some interesting history. She talks about youknowwho’s catholic guilt connection to the principle of ‘muscular Christianity’ and his self flagellating personality. I think he is a deeply troubled man who probably dislikes himself quite a lot with more than his fair share of Catholic inspired guilt. Now, lets never speak of him again so he cant regain corporeal form and become the dark lord again, although I think we all have an idea of the size of his wand by now!

  4. Although the about turn on climate change is a world wide thing and not just a ‘youknowwho’ issue, v popular in UK especially where they are building up for a Tory victory this year. It seems to be connected to the dodgy dealings on statistics (lies, damned lies etc). Did you see the hideous piece by Miranda Divine the other week about how glad she was that man made climate denial is now the G.O.

    Its too late re ‘youknowwho’ his position as opposition leader and the fact that he makes for good copy will ensure the perpetuation of his mad mental meanderings

    • I was watching Insiders on Sunday for a change (I’m rarely up in time) and Andrew Bolt was whining about how calling Abbott the Mad Monk is offensive. Everyone – include me – just rolled their eyes. Yes he’s a very popular blogger, but why is Bolt given a place on a show about political journalism? He keeps pushing his anti-Rudd barrow – which is fine to do on a blog, obviously – but not fine on Insiders.

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