My teen self

In my dream last night, I was put on detention in high school for going on a winery tour. Unsurprisingly, I was arguing very loudly with Lindsay Lohan (who was putting me on detention) that it was perfectly acceptable for me to be on a winery tour because I was over 18. (No doubt my teenaged self would have mocked my thirty-somethinged self for going on a winery tour, in youthful ignorance about the benefits of someone else driving.)

Anyway, I got emailed one of those ‘advice to my teen self’ things the other day, which I deleted as I always do. But this morning I was thinking about being a teenager and how the only piece of advice I’d give my younger self is to learn a language in high school. That’s it. I wouldn’t do anything differently, because then I wouldn’t be me, and I think I’m pretty damn good. (And modest, clearly.)

I’ve lived in more crappy sharehouses than John Birmingham, but I’ve got some funny stories to tell. I’ve had some shitty boyfriends, but that’s a learning experience that helps you recognise shit when it’s in front of you.

When my Nana died, my sensible siblings used the money she left us to buy mortgages. I used it to put myself through journalism college and go overseas twice – to Uzbekistan, and on the Trans-Siberian Railway, through China, Mongolia and Russia.

I drank a lot of alcohol.

I bought a shitload of cds.

Did I mention I drank a lot of alcohol?

I had fun.

And isn’t that what’s most important?

20 responses to “My teen self

  1. Travelling is the answer to everything, something i only realised a few years ago. Fail school? travel. Break up? travel. Realised all your friends are arseholes? travel. Lose your job? sell a kidney and travel. Read a book set in another country? travel to it. Hate consumerism? travel to a communist state and remember things could be worse.

    Using your inheritance to travel, whilst not ‘responsible’ or ‘forward thinking’ is bloody awesome and therefore commendable.

  2. My advice would be “Stop worrying about what other people think of you.” I was pretty insecure and think this advice would’ve done me the world of good (of course, I was also stubborn, so I probably wouldn’t have listened to it.)

    Travel is IT. I’m super young (24) but I’ve sort of come to term with the fact that I may never own a house because I want to flit across the globe. I have no dreams of mortgages, but I want to live in London, Madrid and Florence. At a minimum.

    • Frances, those are wonderful things to want to do. Home ownership is such an Anglo thing anyway. In France, people rent for life because renters have more rights than they do here.

    • I travelled for 8 years on and off (between jobs n uni) and only managed to finally settle down and get a job as they say at about 26/27 …and on the side of the planet where I knew no one. I literally had $10 arriving in oz. I didn’t get my mortgage til age 33, didnt meet my soul mate til nearly 35. Its never too late or too early for anything and the right time has a habit of just showing itself. At 24 I wouldn’t be too worried about what, if anything, will ever happen in the future…cos it will just happen. life likes that.

      My advice to my tenage self…try and grow (vertically) a little more and avoid permed hair.

      • Thanks Lexy, but I am constantly worrying about what will happen in the future. Mainly because I think I’m too sensible. My worries look like this: “Why am I in this stuffy fulltime job? Why haven’t I moved from my comfort zone? I’M RUNNING OUT OF TIME TO BE RECKLESS AHHH AHHHHHHHH.”

        It’s very stressful.

  3. my only advice to a teen me.

    “don’t, for the love of got get it pierced”

  4. Pingback: My teen self « the news with nipples | Headlines Today

  5. My advice to my teen self would be to travel while you are young and childless.
    Judging from your dream my advice is to lay off the doxy. I took it years ago to ward off malaria and got wierd vivid dreams and in my humble opinion any dream in which Lindsay Lohan appears is definately wierd.

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