Josephine Asher is wrong. She has confused feminism and femininity – and says she is anti-feminist – but it is because of feminism that she can have her views published on News Ltd’s opinion site, The Punch.
Instead of harnessing the different qualities of men and women to energise us, we are striving to make men and women equal.
Equality does not mean being the same. It means having the same rights and opportunities. Asher laments the loss of femininity in our society, but she is free to wear all the frilly dresses and white gloves she wants because feminism has given women more choices than they had before.
More women are joining the battle for the CEO’s chair and pursuing dominance in their homes and communities. But in the process they’re becoming more like men. And men are becoming… well, less like men.
Firstly, while women may be “joining the battle for the CEO’s chair”, it’s certainly not a fair fight. According to the Business Council of Australia, women hold only 10.7 per cent of senior executive positions, 8.3 per cent of board directorships and just 2 per cent of CEO roles. Two per cent. That’s not even a scrap behind the bike shed, let alone a battle.
Feminism has achieved victories for women, but could it be at the expense of femininity, chivalry and attributes of the opposite sex that instinctively attract us to each other?
Someone give that woman a dictionary. Feminism and femininity are two very different things. One of the feistiest feminists I know – Lexy – is very feminine. She could also kung-fu your arse. And she is in a committed passionate relationship with a man who adores her and loves that she is a feisty feminist. You only have to look around at all the people in loving relationships to realise that this is a really stupid point Asher is making. Are we really to believe that men and women aren’t attracted to each other because women have fought for the right to vote and to work in paid employment outside the home?
She then parrots James May’s claim that modern men don’t have “man skills”, which he said – funnily enough – while promoting his new show, Man Lab. (And thereby proving that the Australian and US mainstream media can be relied on for free publicity.)
Well into the last century the husband provided his family with a home and food and this sole responsibility gave him a sense of power and purpose. And women didn’t feel pressure to justify their existence with a career. They were proud home makers and mothers.
How do you know? Many of these “proud home makers and mothers” were bored out of their minds. Many also relied on valium – aka “mothers little helper” – to get them through the tedium of the day. (I’m ignoring the bullshit about justifying our existence.)
Sigh. Here we go again. Feminism is to blame for blah blah blah. If it wasn’t for feminism, Asher’s article wouldn’t have been published because no one would care about her opinion.
Women are also suppressing traditional feminine characteristics like elegance and fragility to take on high power careers and step into male dominated roles.
Women are fragile? Puh-lease. I’ve never been called fragile in my life and I can assure you, I am one hellava woman.
The Annual Child Care and Workforce Participation Survey found 33 per cent of women who returned to work did so for independence, and 27 per cent for career progression.
What reasons did the other two thirds – the majority – give?
However, a British survey of 2000 men revealed one-third of men would prefer to be the sole breadwinning traditional father while another quarter would like to be the main breadwinner with their spouse working only part-time.
So, you mean the majority of British men are happy with both parents working? And we don’t know what questions were asked in this survey – perhaps they said they would prefer traditional roles because it means one parent could be with the kids, instead of both parents working their arses off and neither getting to spend time with the kids. That’s not the same as saying they don’t want women to work.
My friend Dave told me his wife speaks to him in the same tone as she speaks to their children – and the dog.
“Kids, turn off the TV, Buster outside, Dave, the dishes aren’t going to clean themselves.” Dave feels like he’s surrendered his balls.
We don’t know Dave. We don’t know Dave’s wife. Perhaps Dave and Dave’s wife both work full time, yet Dave expects her to do all the housework and all the childraising. Perhaps Dave is a douchecanoe. And with a name like “Dave”, perhaps he doesn’t even exist. If this is the best example Asher’s got, then she’s dropping the straws she’s clutching at.
When a man is stripped of his sense of purpose, it’s more difficult to satisfy that instinctive hunger for power and purpose. Could this be part of the reason why one in eight Australian men experiences severe depression in their lifetime?
Women are twice as likely as men to experience depression. Perhaps it’s because we still don’t have equality in Australia.
Would we be happier if more of us accept that men and women are not equal?
No. No we wouldn’t. We’d be happier if we all accepted that men and women are different, but deserve the same rights and opportunities. That we should all be equal.