This post started as a tweet earlier today:
You know what I’ve learned from working in an office? That other people have serious problems with their poo.
I’ve worked in several offices, but this one is by far the pooiest. And I don’t mean people oversharing – although I had a housemate once who kept me regularly informed – but people befouling the toilets. Some days there’s so much poo in them that they should be called toilet bowels. (People in this office seriously need to eat more fibre.)
But it’s the poo outside the toilet bowl that’s the most disturbing.
We had a poo smearer.
Over a few weeks, the poo situation rapidly progressed from skid marks to chunks actually on the toilet seat, to treasures stuck on the back of toilet doors, to one delightful day when it was smeared across the mirror. That someone risked a co-worker walking in while they had their fingers in poo on the mirror is fascinating.
The bigger the company, the messier the kitchen and bathroom – no doubt because there are more people who can be blamed for the mess. Or maybe it’s just because when you don’t know the names of all the people you work with, you don’t give a shit about cleaning up your shit.
And the messier the kitchen, the more signs asking you to “respect your colleagues”. As if the type of person who walks past the dishwasher to dump their plate in the sink for someone else to clean up is going be less of a douche because of a sign.
So, time to share. What’s the grossest thing you’ve seen in your office?
(PS: On the topic of being regular, we’ll have the internet again in a few days – apparently – so I’ll be back to daily blogging.)