Oh look, today we have someone who couldn’t honour his own marriage, writing about how only silly women are interested in marriage, but it’s ok to celebrate the wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton. At least, I’m assuming that Ross Cameron, occasional opinion writer for the Sydney Morning Herald is the same socially conservative Christian who lost his seat of Parramatta after having multiple affairs. His wife being pregnant didn’t stop him from being a whore. That’s not very Christian-like behaviour, is it?
Ross Cameron’s opinion piece in the Sydney Morning Herald: William, Kate and everybody you know:
(I’m guessing the sub came up with the Miranda July reference in the title. Cameron doesn’t look like he’d know who she is.)
For every woman in a relationship with a ”dud” male, it is an affirmation that somewhere out there is a bloke prepared to say ”I do”. Every wedding reassures an army of single 30-somethings that ”what I am asking is not unreasonable”.
Ah yes, because every woman views every relationship in terms of its marriage potential, because the only thing women want is to be married. Since the day I was able to form thoughts in my own head, all I’ve wanted is to be married. Frankly, it doesn’t matter who the bloke is, as long as I’ve got that ring on my finger and that magical piece of paper that says my relationship is somehow different to paperless relationships. And look, he’s even added the spectre of the desperate 30-something, biological clock tick tick tocking. I’m surprised he didn’t go all Paul Sheehan on our arse and throw in a Sex and the City reference to show he’s down with the kids.
The vows are uttered in public because they are so outrageous they have to be witnessed.
I guess if you promise to be faithful to someone and then have a shitload of affairs, wedding vows would seem outrageous. Or is that being unkind?
This wedding is an expression of one of our deepest and most pervasive myths – the princess. Despite an intense feminist assault, this little black duck is not giving up. Disney Consumer Products raised $300 million from princess sales in 2001 but will earn $1 billion this year.
Wait, that doesn’t even make sense. The princess isn’t a little black duck – she’s in every fucking toy aisle and every fucking costume available to a little girl. (In costume land, women get the sexy princess version.) It’s like he’s so desperate to write something that is “hip and happ’ning” that he’s just vomiting key phrases on the page and it all ends up being meaningless. Seriously, when was a princess – a Disney princess – ever a little black duck?
If you were to remove every woman who had ever declared “I want to be treated like a princess”, you would solve Sydney’s road congestion.
Oh, just fuck right off with your dismissive attitude towards women. We can see through you.
The first half of Ross Cameron’s piece is about how women are silly because the only thing they want is to get married, and the second half is a blowjob for the monarchy. About how you’re not a real human if you don’t watch the wedding. It just doesn’t make sense.