Scraping the absolute bottom of the news barrel

Fucking hell, News Ltd websites run some shit they call news, don’t they? Check out the main pic at dailytelegraph.com.au:

Daily Telegraph 21 July

At the Daily Telegraph, some famous people not watching a movie is Important News

Yes, you read that correctly. The royal newlyweds weren’t able to watch a movie on a flight. It’s a perfect example of investigative journalism and front page news that should be taught to journalism students everywhere.

At heraldsun.com.au, it’s such important news that it’s an Editor’s pick:

Herald Sun 21 July

All the important news at heraldsun.com.au

I don’t know why the “royal couple” means a photo of half that couple. It’s not like it’s difficult to find a photo of them together.

News.com.au also ran this story, along with “news” about Apple fakes in China (holy shit, get outta here), an expensive boat, and an entertainment reporter saying she likes trashy mags but most of it’s made up. Yet nothing about Uncle Rupert. Funny that. (And I have to thank @agnte for showing me that’s not even news.)

News Ltd owns 70 per cent of the Australian news media. Just think of all those stories that aren’t being covered while online editors get their teams of journalists to put other people’s stories about trivial bullshit on their websites.

Update:
Editor’s pick at dailytelegraph.com.au is now a video of a dog jumping out of a car window. You couldn’t make this shit up.

Daily Telegraph editor's pick

A video of a dog jumping out of a car window is news. Apparently.

43 responses to “Scraping the absolute bottom of the news barrel

  1. David Turnbull

    Really bad use of ‘fail’ in the headline, too. At least outside of 4chan.

  2. Oh come on, surely you realise all that phone-hacking stuff is just a beat-up by our evil competitors, don’t you? (Ooops, did I say ‘OUR’? Better keep quiet about my retainer.)

  3. They’ve scraped right through the bottom of the barrel and are wallowing in the primeval sludge. This is news? Like hell.

  4. Yeah, crap story. I would much rather have read the other front page story about the crowds at the new Costco store in Sydney. I mean, the only thing better than actually shopping for toilet paper is reading about it, right?

  5. But they are our future King and Queen and you think it is not serious news when they get treated like the ordinary people. Shame on you, what else are the newspapers for if not to tell how these dear neglected Royal Majesties are movie deprived and they most likely kept their spirits up, by themselves, till they were compensated . Next you will be picking on geriatric newspaper owners just trying to make a decent living and politicians who can’t remember what story they told yesterday .The media are doing the best they can with the journalists they have it’s time for some compassion.

    • You’re right, tredlgt. I am being too critical of the poor multinational media organisation. They have enough on their plate at the moment without me pointing out their failings.

  6. It’s about time you do it all the time they are supposedly human too and might have feelings.

  7. They’ve only been married 5 minutes. What the fuck did they want to watch a movie for, anyway ? Wills should have been rogering Kate, instead……

    • I don’t normally publish comments about someone else’s sex life, but this made me smile for the sheer ridiculousness of the royal couple having sex in first class. Fender4eva, welcome to the News with Nipples.

  8. I recently returned from Britain. Whilst I was there it was very interesting to watch the front pages of the newspapers. They revealed with their inanity which were controlled by Murdoch…some of them were a surprise to my parents who thought they were independent.

  9. That’s right McDonalds is opening a new store…SCOOP!!

  10. It could be argued that there was news value in reporting the fake Apple stores story, but I agree with the rest of your post.

  11. I gave up buying anything other than the AFR a long time ago – it’s my private, totally ineffectual protest against paying for mediocre journalism. Unfortunately, the mediocrity isn’t contained to just print media: is it just me, or is the fluff piece the new black?

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